What made me interested in Yoga 4 Change and the Trauma Informed Yoga certification you may ask. This journey goes back 4,267 days to April 12th, 2009.
Easter Sunday, a bright, beautiful day in North Florida. A beautiful day for a boat outing. My husband Michael, daughter Liz and I were invited to dinner at a friend’s house on this Easter Sunday. Our daughter called about 11:00am and said that a group of friends were going boating to St. Augustine and would it be okay if she went. Of course I said, a beautiful day outside on the water, which she adored, with friends, was far better than dinner with her parents and their friends. I told Liz I loved her and to call me when she got home. That was, and forever will be, my last conversation with my 20 year old youngest child.
The death of a child is like nothing anyone can ever prepare for. It takes the natural sequence of life and death completely out of order. A parent is not supposed to bury a child but that’s what we did. I couldn’t believe that this was now my life, our life, my husband, other daughter and my new normal. I could barely breathe, no less participate in my yoga practice with my kula. This was my community but didn’t they know how much pain I was in?
Know they did. These friends enveloped me with their love, their compassion, their sense of just sitting with me while I mourned and cried. Eventually I was able to come back into the community to practice. My friends said Liz’s name, like music to my ears, asked how our other daughter Sam was doing, my husband and of course, me.
One day a good friend asked if I wanted to get my teacher certification for yoga. At first I hesitated, but as she explained it, I never even had to teach. It would be about the journey. So I said yes, and this began my journey as a teacher of yoga.
Fast forward 8 years. I read an article on Trauma Informed Yoga on a plane coming home from a trip. I knew right away, this was my calling. Yoga saved my life when I wasn’t really sure that I wanted to continue to live that life. I knew the power of the mat and the calmness and serenity one could feel while practicing yoga. I also knew that I could tell yogis my story and help them to understand that yoga is so much more than the asanas. It’s the breath, the body, the mind. Alas, I could not find a certification class anywhere near me. Jacksonville as a second tier city, even with its challenges and opportunities, didn’t have anything vaguely like that offered for both students or teachers.
And then I saw it, Yoga 4 Change was offering the certification. Instinctively, I knew this was my calling. The culling together of two parts of my life that are instrumental in creating the tapestry I call me. I believe that my yoga journey to honor the life my daughter lived has made me a better person, and I wanted to share that belief. I want to bring my story with me on the mat to help me better understand other’s stories and help them embrace the power of yoga and the community of yogis. This is my journey, this is my calling, this is what I have been craving for the last 4,267 days.
Blog written by Abby Steele
